Are all those posts from happy couples really a genuine sign of happiness?
We all have that one friend who posts all the cheesiest stuff directed at their significant other. He or she always has some sort of love quote to share or a photo of their “relationship goals” or a cheesy movie scene with the caption “OMG that’s so us!” It’s unnecessary, and perhaps even cringe-worthy. But whatever makes them happy, right?
Those posts might not actually be an indication of how happy these couples are.
Social media has made it so easy for us to post about our lives, and all the interaction we get in the form of comments and likes can make us feel validated about what we post. Whether it’s a selfie or a pregnancy announcement, we get a kind of kick from knowing that we got 200+ likes and comments from those posts. So how does that relate to posting about our relationships?
1. You can make yourself feel better about your relationship by posting only the happy times.
If we post about all the fun and romantic stuff in our relationship, we can convince other people that we are happy in our relationship. In turn, making other people see and react to all this happiness can validate the feeling that yes, we are indeed happy. In short, we’re convincing other people to convince ourselves.
2. In the presence of genuine joy and elation, we tend to forget to take photos.
When you’re in the moment with your significant other, taking photos to post online should be the last thing on your mind.
3. Couples who keep their arguments out of social media are better off.
No matter how angry you may be at your significant other, telling the whole world via Facebook will do nothing for your relationship.
4. Posting too much about your relationship implies you’re seeking validation externally.
Do you find more happiness in being with your significant other or do you find that happiness when POSTING about your significant other and getting all those likes? There’s a huge difference.
5. Genuinely happy couples have nothing to prove.
Most people who post too much about their relationships do so not because they’re gushing with joy but because they want to prove something. Sometimes it’s to “stake their claim” on their significant other. Sometimes it’s to make an ex jealous. Sometimes it’s to prove to friends and family that they’re oh-so-happy! See #1.
6. Science shows that people spend less time on social media tend to be happier.
A study showed that people who excessively use social media may be depressed because they constantly compare their daily life with the highlights of another person’s life. Let’s face it; no one’s life could possibly be as picture-perfect as they portray on social media. So whenever you feel the need to compare your life with theirs, take a step back and consider the fact that you’re only seeing a tiny portion of their lives.
The happiness you feel in your relationship may be so overwhelming that you feel the need to share it with friends and family, and that’s perfectly fine. However, you have to consider whether you’re posting out of sheer joy or you have any of the ulterior motives mentioned above.